I’m Not Feeling You

I was feeling really sad about missing Thanksgiving this year, but then I remembered that turkeys are just big dry chickens with my balls on their face.

Things change fast in the world of I’m Not Feeling You. It can be hard to keep track. But, it has recently come to my attention that since I moved to a magic place, I’m Not Feeling You no longer seems to be the twice-daily comedy fantasia it once was. I’ve heard you ask, is it weekly?  Biweekly? Monthly? Seasonal?

Perhaps it all of those things. Maybe it’s more. An elusive magical beast? A lost civilization appearing and disappearing on a whim? Or is it a dream too real to touch? A reality too ephemeral to dream?

Judging from the table next to me, Korean guys really know what they’re doing when it comes to clams. Korean girls have it pretty good. Of course, that’s not really true, it seems like chicks in Korean have a it pretty tough… not as tough as clams have it though.

You know who hates moths? Korean kids. Like jump out of their seats, run around screaming, wave their hands in the air, monkey-spaz hate. Like, whoa guys sack-up, hate. Anyway, fine, you hate moths, that’s annoying and stupid, but fine. Except. Except!  Except you guys eat the shit out of some bundaegi (silkworm larvae)… which are fucking moth babies (or cocoons, but whatever)…

…and I’m sure they’re delicious, but guys, you can eat eggs, or you can scream like a little bitch every time you see a chicken, but you can’t do both.