Archive for the 'Dogs' Category
I’m Not Feeling You Montauk Monster
If my years with Hamilton have taught me anything, it’s what a dog looks like with its nose bitten off. Sorry Gawker, that’s a fucking dog. In fact, here’s a list of things that it could be in order of likelihood.
1.Dog
2. Guy in a dog suit
3. Several small dogs piled together to look like a larger dog that looks like a monster
4. Raccoon
5. A different dog from the dog I first thought it was
6. Pig
7. Dog
8. Dog
9. Dog
10. Monster Dog
I’m Not Feeling You Beverly Hills Chihuahua
Last time I saw a Taco Bell commercial, I remember thinking, “Someone should really make a movie out of this, and if they do, they should make the song sound like a combination of all the worst songs in the world.” It’s like the Macarena with a dash of Who Let the Dogs Out and the rapping sounds like when Michelle used to bust it out on Full House. It’s like Disney has a microchip inside my brain. Scary.
I’m Not Feeling You Proposing A New York City Pit Bull Ban
This is my dog, Hamilton, who I’m not feeling. As you can see he is more dog than weapon and more semi-vegetative sloth than dog. I’m sorry those other dogs hurt those other people, but Peter Vallone, if you try to take him from me I will bite you in the face with my teeth.
Fuck BSL. Breed Specific Legislation is Bull Shit Legislation.
And Pit Bull people are crazy.













