I’m just saying, after Heath, Christian Bale, and now Morgan Freeman, I wouldn’t be leaving the house if I were Aaron Eckhart or Michael Cane… or their wives and/or mothers.

I’ve never received a Facebook gift in my life, yesterday I got two. Yes people, I do want to see Pineapple Express, it looks awesome. But how about we try not to blow up my spot so hard ok? Thanks. Also, while you’re dicking around on Facebook anyway, be sure to join the I’m Not Feeling You fan page.

Last time I saw a Taco Bell commercial, I remember thinking, “Someone should really make a movie out of this, and if they do, they should make the song sound like a combination of all the worst songs in the world.” It’s like the Macarena with a dash of Who Let the Dogs Out and the rapping sounds like when Michelle used to bust it out on Full House. It’s like Disney has a microchip inside my brain. Scary.

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If Woody Allen and E.T. had a baby it would be really fucking long and boring.