I’m Not Feeling You

A) North Korea is reporting that has used it’s Taepodong-2 rocket technology to successfully launch a satellite into orbit. According to North Korean sources the satellite is currently broadcasting data to Pyeongyang. Which is funny cause South Korean and American sources are reporting finding the North Korean Satellite floating in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.

B) Oh man did I love drawing this picture. Loved it like, I didn’t really have anything funny to say about this North Korean Rocket thing, but I wrote this post anyway. Loved it like, why don’t I marry drawing this picture.

C) Sounds like the Taepodong you get after two bottles of Soju. Ayyyyyyyyyo!

Always “C”. Every time.

Sure, times are tough, but at least the weather’s nice the economy’s going to be OK the Christian Right’s been booted out of Washington there’s some holiday spirit left in this country the bad guys get what they deserve there haven’t been any terrorist attacks recently I don’t have a tiny foot growing inside my head.

Check out the video.

God: Guess what?

Me: Hi.

God: ‘Sup. Guess what? I made a new squid! It’s got elbows!

Me: Oh. Cool.

God: What, you no likey?

Me: Real talk?

God: Sure.

Me: Did you get to any of that other stuff we talked about? You know, with Darfur, and the rainforest and stuff…

God: Uhm…

Me: Yeah, cause I think we were good for kinds of squid.

God: This one’s got elbows!

Toxic gasses are apparently rising from the befouled Greenpoint earth and seeping into the dwellings of residents, slowly poisoning them. Renters, particularly, are at risk, vasince concern for property values is causing many landlords to prevent the city from inspecting their homes.

Interesting historical footnote: In the 1900s coal miners would routinely bring hipsters into the mines. Because hipsters have such weak constitutions, as long as the Hipster was breathing, the miners knew their air supply was relatively safe of methane, carbon monoxide and other toxic gasses. A dead hipster in a coal mine signalled an immediate evacuation.